challeges of the future or will i fail again
Current mood: contemplative
I am trying to contemplate on wether i am strong enough emotionly and whether i should continue to fight or should i give up and let go of the only thing i feel i have left to live for even if there probably is not any chance that i will win...should i continue to to grab at straws or let go...10 days ago was the hardest day of my life so far...i had to say goodbye to my 5 yr old daughter and who knows when i will see her again if i ever will again...the day before that i said goodbye to my to babies my 2 yr old daughter and my 3 yr old son...i continue the battle for my 6 yr old only i can see him and he dont understand why and dont know i am still fighting for him...i feel so hopeless and alone...i feel like i have failed them all...a little less then a month ago i tried to kill myself over this and failed again...i fail at everything i do in life...i have never succeeded at anything...when will it all end...when will my life end...how is it i cant even succeed at taking my own life and i have failed at suicide several times what am i doing so wrong...why am i such a failure...why have i been a failure my whole life
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